the day before...

It is the day before uni starts. The Sunday before my first university class. The weekend before I start the real life of a uni student. I am terrified. But not as much as I was last week.

I go through different moods and opinions about the course. Friday I was petrified that I would hate the course. Saturday I was concerned that I would be competent. Today I am terribly nervous, but I think that the course will be good.

Tomorrow I have two lectures - Maths and Imaging Theory & Practice. Nothing too scary. Maths is really just what I did in Maths Methods during VCE. And the other lecture is just theory stuff. I will be ok. I hope.

I suppose the thing I worry about most is that it isn't going to work. I am going to be late for classes, or not understand fundamentals, or not have enough experience, or not have the right equipment, or not have enough time... The things that pretty much everyone worries about. So I suppose if I cross my fingers and hope everything might just fall into place...

away from home...

I am about to finish my first week away from home. It is Friday and today I am heading back to my family for the weekend, but this week has certainly been interesting!

O Week was excellent - so much fun. I met nearly all of the people in my class (there are only 20 of us so it isn't that hard). I am absolutely and completed freaked out about Monday when classes start, but hopefully I will manage. I am worried that maybe I won't like the course, but I will just have to wait an see, I suppose. I kept getting lost on campus - the place is huge and different buildings connect so if you walk down one corridor you actually find yourself in a different building, which is fun. The library is two floors, and because it has just undergone major renovations, even some of the library staff don't know where everything is!

Ah, and my home away from home? It is interesting. On each floor there are 20 rooms - my floor is just about full and there are about 5 girls. I am the only girl in my hallway. Everyone is nice, which is good. I still haven't worked out the whole "cooking for myself, alone" bit. I keep my food stuffs in my room, and I haven't got that much space, so this week has either been two minute noodles, microwave dinners or eating out - that has to change. I have to sort out which is the cheapest, easiest and tasiest (or which is fits a bit of each...) then just live that way.

I am a bit nervous about today. I have to go shopping for heaps of photography equipment, which means a fair bit of $$$ will be spent. I always get a bit edgy when I have to do that - I just hope I buy the correct things! Or at least keeps receipts until I am positive I got the right things.

Well, now I am off to work out the tram system - I think I will be riding the tram at least 4 times today, then two trains, before I get home. The joys of public transport...

box jungle...

My room has a jungle of boxes. I move on Saturday and I started packing yesterday, so my room is half packed with open boxes all over the place. I can just get to my desk, and I have to climb over boxes to get around my room. I have even ended up sticking a box of rubbish outside my door just because it doesn't fit in the room. Currently I have three boxes on the go - one to go with me, one to stay and one of rubbish. The one to go with me is just about full, then I can get it out of the room.

And the list I wrote this morning with things that I need to do or buy is huge. I didn't think until this morning about how I will need saucepans and sharp knives and kitchen utensils. And I need to buy some groceries. Argh, there is so much to do!

I should probably go and do it all...

the moving ritual...

So, two weeks from today is my moving day.

I move in two weeks.

In two weeks, I will be living away from home.

And I have started the process. I have started cleaning out my cupboards. I have got boxes to pack my room away in. I have discovered that I have way too much stuff, and I will have to leave a lot of it with my parents. I have started developing my budget, and realising how expensive it will be to be a Photography student living away from home. I have started looking for a job in Melbourne. I have bought my own cutlery, and plates, etc. I now own two yellow tea towels of my own. I have 'Melbourne bed linen' - for Melbourne.

But I have yet to come up with a way to refer to the place I will be living. I tried calling it 'my apartment' but it is really just one room so 'apartment' seemed too much for it. I tried 'my room' but that wasn't really that different from from referring to my bedroom at home. The most recent one was 'my place', but that doesn't seem to be quite right either. I don't know... Maybe if I just try not to refer to it at all. But that won't work. I suppose I will keep working on a way to talk about it. I'm sure I will come up with something...

But even if I don't come up with a name for it, it is still where I will be living, at least for the next sixth months... On my own, for the first time in my life.

My mum told me how once she moved out of home for uni she never stayed at home again. After uni she got a house with her boyfriend of the time (who was to become my father), got married, got a family home and went from there. Maybe that will happen to me... Actually, my newest idea is that once I finish uni I will come back home for sixth months or so and work and save money, then try and work overseas for a while. I think that would be really exciting! A few of my friends are taking a Gap year and travelling, but I think I would like to do it once I have my skill - after uni. It would be an adventure that my mum has told me she has regreted all her life - she didn't travel and now she wishes she did, and I don't want to pass up that chance, even if I force the chance to come about!

So moving in two weeks, maybe travelling in three years... Adventures abound!!

once more a student...

On Wednesday I enrolled. Yes, I am again a student - an official student. An official uni student. That should scare me - and it does somedays, but funnily enough, today it doesn't seem to.

I was nervous before enrolling - I'm a chicken and so before I do anything new or different I get nervous. But, in the end, it all went very smoothly. I am now an RMIT student, who is one of nine just-finished year 12s in the course, and one of 22 students in the course. It is about the same size as a high school class, so it sounds pretty manageable for me. The scariest thing is that 13 of the students are mature aged, which will be quite different for me. And there could be boys - shock horror! I haven't actually been in classes with the opposite sex since primary school because I went to an all-girls high school - so that will take some getting used to.

And I am moving out in a few weeks - another new and exciting thing!! I move to a tiny little room, with shared facilities, but it should be fun! I will be able to do stuff for myself, but I suppose that can also be "I will have to to do stuff for myself", and also be selective about what I take. After I enrolled I went to check out the place. I will be on the 11th floor with a bit of a view. The building is a 'U' shape, and my room is in the part that can see the building, with a bit of a view out the side of the window - I must post a picture once I move in. I am incredibly excited about movin! Megs has said she will stay with me sometimes, so that will be exciting!!

Yes, I really am excited about moving - on with life!!

time for a big-en...

It's about time I caught up this blog with my life, not that there is all that much to write about except the daily activities of an 18 on holidays and planning for university. I know I promised something of substance, something imaginative... I will get there at some stage. Again, I make a promise I will try another day. But it is late and I just feel like writing about the daily goings-on in my life.

I came back from a little family holiday yesterday. We went to a homestead my aunty has just take over. It is beautiful! Luscious gardens, great expanses of nothing but nature, and time to myself to do whatever I wanted. I walked around taking photos one day, then the next I just sat under a tree on the gorgeous green grass all day and read my (700 page) book. I took some night photos of star trails and playing with light (which I may scan and show at some stage). I did a bit of driving. I slept on an incredibly uncomfortable sofa bed (which I ended up ignoring the last night, when I put the foam mattress on the floor so I didn't have metal bars digging into my hip). I relaxed and I enjoyed myself. It was a night little holiday, that's for certain!

While I was away I also got accepted into my university course. I was one of nine year 12 students to get a place - for a total of 22 places. I was so happy about it. I enrol next Wednesday and move on the 18th of February. Most of my friends got what they wanted to! I was excited for them about as much as I was excited for me!

I still have to remind myself (though this will sound dumb) that I really have moved on from high school. In two weeks (when high school goes back) I won't have to get up early to get my school uniform on and go to the start of year assembly. I am no longer a high school student. I am a university student - and it is scaring me silly! I just can't seem to get my head around it.

It may not really be such a big deal to other people, but I wasn't the student who waited for year 12 to come so she could leave. I was the scared, shy unadveturous student who was quite happy staying at high school because she new that (normally) five out of seven days she would get up and put her school uniform on before going to a very well-known, and safe environment. I had all my friends there, I had lovely teachers and I enjoyed the environment. I didn't become excited about university until recently when I realised that I had to think of it as an adventure rather than a fucking scary new part of my life that I might not handle - because the number of people who have succeeded in growing up is phenomenal.

I have to believe I can succeed. I just have to.

I will be moving out of home. Looking after myself. Getting to classes, and getting home from classes by myself. I will be catching the train to visit my family only on weekends and holidays. I won't be with them for breakfast and dinner and a lot of time in between, like I am used to. I will have to create my own new world, though I know the old one will still be there if I need it. And I'm sure I will. I mean, to be completely candid, I cried every night for the first week of high school because growing up just scared me so damn much.

I am a wuss. I am a sook. I am not courageous.

But I can do something if I put my mind to it. So that is what I am going to have to do. Face everything head on, and deal with it the best way I can come up with.

I just have to, because this is life. And it isn't going to just be easy or simple if I want it too. I have to try my hardest and live. Live each day if I must. But I will do it.

I am determined.

i will...

I will blog.

When I get home I promise, I will write something with some substance. Something with some meaning. Something, maybe, with some creativeness.

Or maybe I will just write about me, because by me and about me doesn't ever equal creative.

But I will blog.

I promise.

holiday life...

Sometimes I like being on holidays - other times I don't. I love having time to do what I want, but I then end up doing the same things all the time which, in the end, becomes boring. I still have close to two months left of holidays - uni doesn't start until the 6th of March. But I do move on the 20th, so that's exciting. Actually, it had turned out that I will move out of my bedroom earlier. The story is, I promised my sister we would swap rooms when I move away (my room is bigger). But now she wants the room before high school starts for the year - and that is on the 2nd of February. So I move out of my room into her room at the end of January, then to Melbourne at the end of February. So I sort of go into limbo for a couple of weeks. It will be good though, because on weekends I will come home to my "new room", so I will have some time to get used to it, and get it the way I feel comfortable! That's a plus. And it will force me to get rid of some of my stuff - I just have to much stuff!! I don't know how I accumulated it all! I have started doing some cleaning out, but I still have a long way to go...

I have just discovered the most beautiful singer. A half Icelandic, half Italian singer/songwriter named Emiliana Torrini. Her music is mesmerising! It is haunting and beautiful and melodic and lovely! I got her CD for Christmas, after, not just hinting, but asking that someone get it for me - and I'm so glad I did. I have been listening to her all week, and she is wonderful! I'm sure that Jo would like her!

It was pointed out to me yesterday that I have neglected photography. Mum commented that she found it ammusing that since I got into my photography course for next year, I haven't really picked up a camera. I mean, I took a few family shots of Christmas day and played with my Aunty's new camera, but that is about it. I haven't added any new pictures to my website in ages, and I haven't used any film in ages. I think I just go used to not having my camera while it was being fixed, and I haven't really been anywhere inspiring. I am going to the country in a week for a mini-holiday, and I plan to take both my film and digital cameras and hopefully take a few good pictures! It is meant to be really pretty where we are going - so I may have something photographic to show for it when I get back... Here's to hoping!

silly-ness abounds...

Happy New Year to one and all!! 2006 is sure to be an exciting year, at least for me - moving, turning 19, starting Uni.. Exciting stuff!!

New Years Eve was spent quietly with a good friend and a couple of bottles of Midori and Lemonade. We watched TV, and twirled poi in the backyard. Then just before midnight, we went running down the street (me in bare feet, and perhaps not quite running, more strolling) with glow sticks! They are awesome, and so much fun! This was then followed with bed at 1am, reading a book and getting a good night sleep because I had to work on Sunday. Not incredibly eventful - but lots of fun just the same!! I think I prefer doing the quiet thing rather than the all out drunkeness. I think it suits my personality!

This weeks holds not much for me. Working. Maybe taking some photographs. Cleaning out my bedroom. Getting some more stuff organised for moving. And more working. That is really about it. But I like it that way. And I plan to enjoy this week! As well as all the other weeks until Uni starts!!

christmas and dreams...

Yes, I am really moving! Mum is calling the accommodation place today (supposedly) and booking a place for me. I will be living across the road from Melb Uni and up the street from RMIT - sounds pretty damn good to me! I am getting a fridge, and my computer will be coming with me. I have even promised Sarah my room (because it is bigger than hers and it will have my double bed left in it). I will have to take down all my pictures on my walls and empty all my cupboards... Take the books from my bookshelf and the photos from walls... I have to pack my clothes, and take my doona. I have to move myself! It is an odd thought really. I will be leaving my home. Yes, I will be leaving home. My room will no longer be my room. I won't have my mum around - or my sister. And I seriously have way too much stuff to fit in the place I am moving to. It is a 10sqm room. My room at home is a fair bit bigger... It is almost exhilirating think that I will be gone from this room - it won't be mine any longer... I have been in this room for five years, and it has been nearly the same furniture arrangement for about two or three years. Actually, it is funny because I tend to move the first year of things. I moved into this house the first year of high school, and I will move into my own little room the first year of uni. Hmmm...

So as well as worrying (or being excited...) about Christmas and presents and such, I get to start sorting through my life before I move out! Out of home! And all but two Christmas presents have been bought, and all the the ones I do have are wrapped, so there isn't that much to worry about. So, soon enough, I will have to change my address I suppose, sort out an internet and phone connection in my room, organise plates and cutlery, buy my own laundry detergent-stuff and get my bum out of Geelong... Here I go!!

moving...

I was so excited about moving. But no one else seems to be anymore (except my sister, who wants my room). Actually, to be honest, most people are excited, just not the people I need to be excited - my mum and dad. Dad just constantly asks me question about why I want to move, and how much things will cost, and why move when I can commute, and if I have to live close to Uni, or if I could live a little distance away. I can't decide whether he is doing it to make sure I like my decision, or whether he is secretly telling me, with all the hounding questions, that he doesn't think it is a good idea. And mum just keeps changing her mind. Sunday she thought moving was the best idea. By Monday she wasn't as enthusiastic. Then Tuesday she thought it was a great idea. But today she doesn't seem to care. It is confusing me! I hadn't wanted to move to begin with - I am a chicken who doesn't even like driving an automatic car or taking the train on her own, let alone move to Melbourne on my own. Then when I heard what she thought I got excited, and really eager to get things happening. Now she has pulled back and I'm not sure if moving is the right thing to do. I think it would be awesome to live close to school, and it would be an adventure that I have been working myself up to the past few days, but now I don't know... I'm worried that I won't like it, but these concerns only seemed to be a problem when the people I wanted to support me sort of stopped. I suppose mum is having to come to terms with her 'first born' moving away - to the big city! But she just seems to be all over the place, and it isn't helping. This is a big step, or at least in my mind it is. And so many of my friends think it is great. And so do I, I'm just getting worried now because of my mum and dad. Is that irrational in some way? Not being able to stick to what you want because your parents are with you 100% all the time. Is is really childish? I can't decide.

And then this afternoon and went through all the certificates I got today (because today was Awards Day at my school and I got the top study scores in my school for two of my subjects, and a special citizenship award) and putting them in my big orange folder that holds all my high school stuff and realised that was really over. I would only put one more thing in that folder - my VCE Certificate. And it is complete, in some way. From the first certificates I got in year 7, to my graduating certificate and VCE Certificate. All of it will be there - the past six year of my life will be summarised, I suppose, in one orange folder. All of the experiences and the learning curve that is high school will be contained in it. It feels strange to think about it. High school was such a huge thing. I loved it. It was much more exciting and freeing than primary school, but now it is over. It was safe. I knew what was going on day to day. I knew who was around if I needed them. I had friends, both peers and teachers. The principal was great, my teachers were great, I had fun. And now it is over. Finished. Completed. Done. It feels strange. So many people cry at the end, but I can't. I'm not actually, or specifically, sad that it is over because by the end I was ready for something new, but I will still miss it. And new things always get my a little bit freaked out - particularly new things like this. I remember starting high school and crying each night for the first week simply because I was overwhelmed with things - I didn't not like it, the difference between primary and high school just threw me, put me 'off balance' I suppose. And maybe that is what my mum is worried about when I go to Uni. If I move away at the very beginning maybe she thinks I won't cope. Or maybe she thinks that a bad and worry-some start will change what I think about the rest of the year. But she moved away when she went to Uni. I don't quite get it...

But one gorgeous and happy and fun thing happened today! I got a gorgeous Christmas present from Megs. She gave everyone Mr Men or Little Miss books by Roger Hargreaves, and she got mine absolutely spot on! She gave my Mr Happy. It describes Mr Happy as "fat and round, and happy!" Fits me!! And the story is about Mr Happy who finds a door, and when he goes through the door (and "round and round and down and down and round and down and down and around" the stairs) he finds Mr Miserable (which is me sometimes). So Mr Happy takes Mr Miserable to Happyland, where Mr Happy lives, of course, and makes him happy! The last page of the story is gorgeous:

And that is really the end of the story except to say that if you ever feel as miserable as Mr Miserable used to you know exactly what to do, don't you?

Just turn your mouth up at the corners.

Go on!

Because that is how Mr Miserable becomes happy - by slowly turning the corners of his mouth up more and more before he smiles. "And then he chuckled, which turned into a giggle, which became a laugh. A big booming hearty huge giant large enormous laugh." And that is perfect for me! So often I feel miserable, like now, and reading that book makes me chuckle!! Wonderful!!!

results and property hunting...

Today VCE results came out. I am still shocked at how well I went. I got an ENTER of 93.1 (out of a (im)possible 100). My study scores were really cool too. They are each out of 50. I got 35 for International Studies, 42 for IPM and English, and 46 for Media. And I got a 31 for Maths, and 33 for Philosophy and a 38 for Psychology last year. It is all finally sinking in - my final results for high school are in - it is completely over. And on top of that, I am getting an offer for my dream course at RMIT and we have started talking about me moving out - to Melbourne where I can be closer to Uni. There has been talk of many options, from buying an apartment, to renting an apartment of getting a room in student accommodation. I'm not sure if I want to live on my own, so I'm thinking maybe the student accommodation or a two bedroom apartment with a friend would be nice... but we will just have to wait and see. I can remember the start of this year I didn't even want to move out of home after one year at Uni, now I am getting really excited about moving out at the start. I just hope everything goes well...

very exciting...

I am so very excited right not for two reasons!!

1. The guy where I am getting my camera repaired called me today to say the camera was ready to be picked up!!

2. I got a letter in the mail today from RMIT University. It is a Type A letter which means they will give me an offer for the course if I have achieved all the academic requirements and have them listed as my number one preference of courses!!! I am going to Uni to study exactly what I want!! I am so excited!! I don't get an official offer until VTAC sends them out early next year, I think.. But I am so excited anyway!! I will be a Scientific Photography student!! Yay!! Yay!!

Yay!!

busy bee...

I have been a busy, busy bee over the last little while - nearly a week since I last blogged!!

Ok, so a rundown of my life for that past (nearly) week:

Friday morning I went to work with mum and cut boards for my folio, and stuck my photos onto the board - and thus finished my photography folio. I am absolutely proud of it, even if other people aren't (more on that in a bit).

Friday night I was meant to work, but it has been so quiet lately that my shift was cancelled. So, instead I went to the Queenscliff Music Festival! It was rainy wnd windy (with an awesome thunder storm) but it was fairly fun. I had got media accreditation as a photographer (which basically means I get in for free) so I raced to James' and borrowed his digital camera (because mine is still in NSW). John took me the forty minutes to Queenscliff with him, because he was recording people for his radio program. I saw Sarah Blasko and Ash Grunwald, as well as some other less notable performances. However, I had started to get sick on Thrusday, so running around in the wet wasn't the best thing for me, and I left feeling like crap - blocked nose, sore throat, headache, you know... I'm glad I went but I felt pretty crappy the next day.

Saturday I did work, but was sent home early because it was so quiet. When I got home I went straight to bed because I felt dreaful, then my mum called up my (other) work and told my boss (who is actually my aunty, so it wasn't that bad) that I was too sick to work. I stayed in bed from about 2pm till 7-ish pm, when mum brought me home some chips for dinner, then we sat and watched Harry Potter before going to bed drugged with Cold and Flu tablets and lots of Panadol.

Sunday mum and I buzzed around the house getting ready for my interviews for Uni on Monday and my Graduation Monday night. She finished my graduation skirt and fixed the necklace I wore, while I finished off all my interview things.

Monday I was out of bed at 6am... Horrible... Got ready, and mum drove me to Melbourne for one entrance test, one information session and two interviews. The entrance test, for Applied Photography, was ok, some of the question about science I thought were silly, but there you go.. The information session, for Scientific Photography, just hit home how much I really wanted to do the course - it is awesome! Then we had lunch, before I went to the Applied Photography interview. I didn't like that interview, the interviewers acted as if they were superior, which just didn't seem fair to me... The Scientific Photography interview was heaps better!! The interviewers (four guys, three American, one Aussie) were really nice. They are science/tech nerds who were debating Mac over PC before me interview (I could hear them through the wall - not that I was intentionally eves-dropping). They seemed really genuine. They chatted between themselves as if they were friends, as well as chatting to me. They were genuinely impressed with my folio (unlike the guys at Applied Photography, who just flicked through and said nothing), and even said that the quality of my folio (the way it was compiled) was better than the way their students do it - which I was pretty chuffed about. The Science interview really lifted my spirits. They were concerned that I hadn't done VCE science, but it was such a positive experience I wasn't that worried about the negatives. We had to race home from Melbourne, because I had to get ready!!

Monday night I graduated!!! I dressed up in all my finery (a beautiful skirt, which I may even photograph to post, a simple brown top and awesome jewellery) and graduated from high school!! When we get our graduation certificates we get them in folders, and on the back of the folders (for some people) are stickers to denote if you got any extra awards - I had three stickers! I got an Academic Excellence award, for receiving high marks for all of my subjects, a Citizenship Award, for being an exceptional student in the school community and helping out, etc., and another special award which I can't remember (it is a special award, that I receive on Awards Day in front of parents and the rest of the school) - I think it was a Community Award, but I can't remember. We get eat, and chat, and dance! The band were great, we boogied and had heaps of fun!! I was in so many photos, so goodness knows how much it will cost me to get the ones that I want - but they are all memories!! It was such a great night - and I can't believe I am done. I am no longer part of the school. It is highly scary, because I don't know what is going to happen now. Until offers come out, I am completely free, nothing in particular planned for the future. It is incredibly daunting knowing that, but also somehow incredibly exciting! The opportunities that are coming up and that I can participate in are amazing - I just hope it all comes together!! But I think it just might...

That pretty much brings everything up to speed, because yesterday I sat around with my sister and watched videos of Gilmore Girls all day, and now it is today. Tomorrow I am going to see the new Harry Potter with Megs which should be good - it looks somewhat scarier than the other movies, and I am looking forward to it. Then I am working on the weekend (hopefully. If my hours are cut I won't have any money to buy Christmas presents) and getting some things up on eBay to sell. The summer is looking pretty damn good to me!!

a Thursday afternoon rant...

Well, it's not really a rant, but I thought it sounded light a cool title...

I got some news about my digital camera this morning. It is going to cost about half what it was to buy new, so the general consensus is that I will get a new camera - the new model. This is exciting, but I am pissed off with myself for causing this to happen. All I did was drop the damn thing - that's it. I suppose digital things are much more sensitive to the odd bump because of all the bits inside them.

Oh, did I comment about the fact that my film camera was playing up? Nope, I don't think I did. Well, it was playing up. The prints were having to be pulled out of completely useless negatives, so John and I went on a mission to figure out what the problem was. Turns out, it was overexposing the film by two stops. Not a good thing really. Now all my prints are turning out perfectly. And, the good thing about my completely-manual camera is that I can trick it! To make the "remembering to expose two stops less than what it wants" thing easier, I can just set my ISO reading two steps higher than the film I am using - perfect! And it works! I have been getting some pretty good black and white prints too, which is exciting. I have chosen about six for my folio. There will be six black and whites, six colour digitals, and one colour film (I think). The colour film probably isn't the best choice, so I might have to rethink that, and replace it with either another digital or another b&w - I'm not sure. It was so hard picking thirteen prints from about 30+. I spent about an hour slowly deciding that the prints I have excluded weren't required because they were a poorer quality duplicate-theme of something I already had, or they weren't as interesting as some of the other prints. I am sure when mum has a look at my choices tonight she will want to make some changes - so I have to make sure I am in a compromising mood. In fact, I really have to be careful because I keep getting grumpy at her - she is just so blunt. One minute we are looking at some of my pictures, then she comments (for example, and she did actually say this) that "this is a waste of space" and I feel crushed, then I get grumpy with her. Then I make a rude comment, making her pissed off, then we have problems. I did that last night, I made a really rude comment, but it is all good now - I apologised!

Yes, so I think I am a little bit stressed at the moment. I mean, I don't do that much each day, but it is because I can't. I don't have a car so I can't go out and take photos, but now I don't want anymore to choose from. Then I start fretting about Christmas because I haven't really done any Christmas shopping and it is only a month away. Then I worry about money, which leads me to worry about when I have to work and what I have to get done before work. Then, because I am working eight hours on Saturday, I start worrying that I might not be completely prepared for my entrance test, interview and information session that I have on Monday, or for my Validictory that I have on Monday night. Then I start feeling bad because I can't go anywhere and I spend my days doing not much, which gets me right back to the start... Argh...

Oh, and just before I sign off for another post, I have created a second blog for myself. It is located here and is called not so rejected. It is where all the photographs that I like, but aren't good enough for me to showcase on my website, reside. I started it today so there is only one image (which has appeared on this blog, but oh well) - but there are sure to be more! Enjoy.

the verdict...

So if yoy read this, you will know that I have been hoping to get into a photography course for University. I got some news about that yesterday (which I commented briefly on in the last post, but I thought I would elaborate). Two of the four courses were sending out details of interviews for the successful applicants, and I didn't get one. Well, not one this round, but I don't think I will get a chance for second round anyway. Now my complete focus is going to be Scientific Photography, and maybe the TAFE course. But the TAFE course was like an absolute back-up, so I think I will just hope that I get into Scientific Photography, or else I will (hopefully, anyway) go to the Uni nearby and do a plain Bachelor of Arts - maybe even try for an Education course for my second year and become a teacher. Lots of people I know think I will eventually become a teacher anyway - so why not bite the bullet and do it now. I will, of course, keep taking photos for fun - I was going to anyway. I love doing so...

But I am still very excited about finishing high school - just like I was yesterday. The funny thing is: now I don't have anything to do! I have to house to myself tonight, and there is absolutely nothing on TV, so I was thinking about what I could fill up my time with, and I couldn't think of anything! Well, I was contemplating tidying up my bookshelves, or going through my wardrobe (again), or doing a ruthless cleanout of all my years work and just my cupboard in general. Hmmm... it is incredibly strange not having anything to do! I have been giving lots of hours to work, though. But thinking about that, I will still have heaps of spare time! How strange! I think I will start selling stuff on eBay or something - have to fill up the time somehow... Suggestions, anyone?

Oh, and in response to that exciting comment from Megs - no news on my camera, it is still in NSW getting a quote about itself. Hopefully it will be ok. Thankful James has decided he will let me use his (new) camera for the music festival that is coming up at the end of November - all very exciting. Actually, I am incredibly jealous of James, he got the new version of my (injured) camera - and it has better megapixels than mine!! Hmmm... I think I shall enjoy borrowing it!

Oh, and I found out I am going to Port Fairy Folk Festival next year - highly exciting!! It is it's '30th Festival' and they have heaps of international and national/local performers coming which I am looking forward to. But I have to wait until Labour Day weekend next year (March) before I get to boogie on down at PFFF... Exciting!!

i'm done...

Yes - I have finished VCE, year 12, high school, and my first 13 years of schooling. And I am unbelievably excited!!!! It is taking a whole lot of composure to right this without multiple exclamation marks - so here are just a few: !!!!!!

I had my last exam today - International Studies. I am actually really pleased with it all. I got to do a little bitching about the Australian/US alliance and what it is doing to the country. The question was something like: "Do the costs of the Australian alliance with the US outweigh the benefits?" Or something like that. Is was pretty cool!

But on the down side, today I found out that I'm not getting an interview for two of the photography courses I applied for. I am a bit sad about it, but I had decided that one of the other courses is the one I would prefer to be doing - so fingers crossed.

That is pretty much all the stuff I have to write about at the moment. Oh, I might put a few more exclamation marks: !!!!!! There, now I'm good!

it is tuesday...

And I am about to do my second exam for this end of high school exam period - finally! I haven't had an exam since the 28th of October (the English exam) and I am going slowly insane being on my own all day. However, this past weekend did give me some fun and laughs! And some (pretend) tears.

On Saturday morning I took my camera to the camera shop. I was told it would take eight weeks to repair, and that was after the quote comes back. The camera has to go to the Fuji factory in New South Wales for repairs - and I miss it already! However, John has reminded me that now I can focus more attention on film photography (which I am not very good at, more info on that comment later). And Sar got her Christmas present early and I have control over it until mine is fixed - oh, it's a camera, the present, by the way. It is a little Digital Pentax with 6mp and three times optical zoom. And it even lets you change the shutter and aperture as you want - which isn't a bad deal for $300. But it isn't my baby - my little Fuji...

Then later on Saturday I had a photographic session with Jess and Josh. They wanted some portraits together and I wanted some practice to it really worked out quite well. I used three films and took the photos down at Buckley's Falls. Now, the thing about me not being very good with film cameras happened during this shoot. My film camera is completely manual, no shutter priority, no aperture, no automatic reading of the ISO needed for the film - and this is where I stuffed up. I shot all three films on an ISO of 125, even though two of the films were meant to be shot on an ISO rating of 400. So, basically, I completely overexposed two roles of film. On the two can (hopefully) be saved during processing, but the other film is basically a colour film that shoots black and white, so it is ruined. Hopefully I find some good stuff to use for my folio in the two pure B&W, otherwise I'm stuffed. I have to have my folio together by the 21st of November - not long now.

Then another good thing happened, Saturday night I went out for the first time! Jess L and I went to see Bomba play at the Nash. We were asked for ID at all, which was kind of a shame because we were actually legal and wanted to show it off - but oh well. I bought my first alcoholic drink, and danced until 1am at a pub for the first time. Bomba were absolutely awesome!!! Really!!

Then Sunday I had to work, which wasn't too bad. It is money! And I have another four shift already lined up. I was working at Baskin Robbins which was good cause I got free ice-cream! And the next four shifts will earn me a lovely sum of money!! I definitely need it for uni! And then today I was given my first shift for the Christmas/holiday/Summer season at Griffiths for December - more money! If this continues, and I don't spend any money over summer, I might actually save a fair bit - 'twood be nice!

Now I have to go study - my second/third-last exam is happening in one hour - just enough time to polish up on the five things I don't yet have sorted in my head...

broken...

My...camera is...........BROKEN!!

Yes, sad, sad news. My gorgeous black Fuji S5000 is broken... And I know exactly how it happened. At Muck Up Day I dropped it - my hands were full and it wasn't around me neck so I suppose it was inevitable, but I am still very sad. Very, very sad! I tried to use it the other night and it kept freezing up on me. Then it wouldn't turn off... So dreadful!

That is all I have to say except: I hate studying on my own!! I keep getting fidgety... No good.

afterwards...

The English exam is done. Over. Completed. Now on to the other three, but study can wait til Monday - it's the weekend! I am so unbelievably glad its the weekend. I had plans for this evening but they have been transfered and downsized to tomorrow (due to exam stress - evil, evil, evil). So tomorrow is a girls night - dinner and, well, then back to each persons own home to sleep I suppose. I really should get out more - I have been 18 for 11 days and haven't done any of the eighteen year old things - none of them! Well, I suppose in a round about way you could count final exams as one, because most (only most) people do them when they are 18. I have got (kinda) drunk though - that I hadn't done before my 18th... But there is the rest of my life to do these types of things! So I suppose I shouldn't worry too much about it all...

Actually, to be honest that is all I have been thinking about - being 18 and finishing school. And I have pretty much written about that for the past few entry's so I don't think there is much point writing about it now... I will have to wait until exams are over and my mind actually moves on - then I will have something to write about.

Well, til then...